BREAKING: Tim Allen’s Death Ruled A Homicide — Suspect Identified

September 10, 2017

The man who ran down Tim Allen while yelling “Who’s still standing now, bitch!?!” has been identified as Detroit rapper “Busta T.” The 45-year-old little known local star sings the songs “Dumb As A Trump Stump” and “Y’all Are Just So F*cking Stupid.” Police say an argument broke out at a local bar Allen likes to go to from time to time when Busta T approached him and told him how much…

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Major Hurricane Irma likely to deliver destructive blow to Florida this weekend

September 8, 2017

After blasting the northern Caribbean, deadly Hurricane Irma will turn toward the United States, unleashing destructive winds, flooding rain and dangerous seas across Florida starting on Saturday. “Unfortunately, there is no way the United States is going to avoid another catastrophic weather event,” Dr. Joel N. Myers, founder, president and chairman of AccuWeather said. “There will be massive damage in Florida. [It will be] the worst single hurricane to hit Florida…

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Cops Arrest Georgia Imam Who Kept Supplies Meant For Hurricane Victims

September 8, 2017

Police in Georgia didn’t take too kindly when the imam of a mosque in Peachton announced that all donations they had collected from the community to help victims of Hurricane Harvey would instead be sent to Syria “to help refugees of America’s perpetual war on Islam.” “Because Donald Trump will not let victims of war and crime seek solitude in the United States, we can not in good conscience help his people when so many Muslims can not find shelter,” said…

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GOVERNOR JOHN KASICH INVITES ALL DREAMERS TO MOVE TO OHIO

September 6, 2017

Celebrity moonbat Cher’s mansion may not be big enough to house all of the Dreamers but the state of Ohio is and they have just been formally invited by the Buckeye State’s governor. John Kasich, that stubborn former Republican presidential candidate and a man who is seen by many as a primary challenger against the incumbent POTUS Donald Trump in 2020 has rolled out the red carpet to the estimated 800,000 people…

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BREAKING: Canadian Muslims Vow Revenge Against ‘Evil American Trumpsters’

September 5, 2017

Muslims and supporters of Muslims across Canada came together with just about every news agency the large yet incredibly small country had to offer on Sunday to inflate a fake news story into an even bigger fake news story of their own.  After he claimed that an “Anti-Islamic” website had misused his image and attached it to a fake news story about Hurricane Harvey any idiot could spot was untrue, all…

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BREAKING: Muslim School Bus Driver Refused To Let Child Off Bus Till She Converted To Islam

September 5, 2017

Wow! Muslims in the United States are getting scary these days! A school bus driver in De Plain, Arkansas was arrested Monday morning after a parent filed a horrifying complaint with the school district. Samantha Mayers said in a complaint with the police and the school district thather 9-year-old daughter was subjected to threats and humiliation after she tried to give a Bible to her bus driver, Assa Lamualaikum, of whom she had grown…

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BREAKING: Mexico Just Started Building A Wall On THEIR Southern Border For ‘National Security’

September 3, 2017

Wow! Unbelievable! Mexico has repeatedly refused to pay for a wall on their northern border to keep drug dealers and criminals from their country from strolling across to our neck of the woods, but guess what they’re doing right this very second? That’s right: they’re building a wall. Citing “criminal elements” that are illegally entering Mexico from their tiny neighbor San Recto as part of a “massive human trafficking ring,” Mexican President Enrique Peña Nieto signed…

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BREAKING: ANTIFA Burned Churches In 9 States To The Ground Overnight

August 30, 2017

ANTIFA, the group of domestic terrorists who think they’re going to “save America” from Donald Trump with violence, has stepped up their game by laying waste to 14 houses of worship in nine states overnight, almost simultaneously. Counter-Terrorism Unit Director James Bauer says the ANTIFAs pose a real existential risk to the United States: “These people are fighting for no cause. Most of them don’t even know what ‘ANTIFA’ means or what they’re fighting…

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BREAKING: First Images Of Bombs Being Dropped On North Korea Released

August 24, 2017

The US Government is releasing images of the bombing of North Korea by its neighbor to the South. In the first act of serious aggression since the end of the Korean Conflict, South Koreaused US-provided Tomahawk and Sidewinder missiles fired from both stationary and mobile platforms. Admiral Fitzwallis of the Pacific Fleet says North Korea’s ability to wage war has been “seriously diminished”: “Pyongyang is now looking at a nation in total blackout. There are zero power…

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BREAKING: Clinton Foundation Cargo Ship Raided At Port Of Baltimore Reveals Sick Secret

August 21, 2017

A ship owned and operated by the Clinton Foundation was raided as it arrived from Africa this morning at the Port of Baltimore. The ship, which was supposed to be carrying “emergency supplies,” was actually carrying a cargo that had authorities stunned. BPA Harbormaster Jake Cummings explained to CNN: “We received a tip that the Clinton Foundation flagship, The Chelsea, was carrying illegal contraband into the United States. We honestly didn’t know what to expect,…

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